Find another low skill job where disingenuous charm or manipulation will win over the hiring manager
Give the appearance of working, but spend more time not-working as that’s much easier than obedience
Run the clock until you qualify for another year of unemployment
Provoke being fired. Complain about your imaginary challenging home life. Insist early on taking sick leave, and family care time. Use all those days quickly.
Refile for unemployment
Sit on yout ass watching tv all day and night
But I have to finish my movie, 1am is a good time to think about sleep. Six hours of sleep keeps my highest intelligence brain whirring and clicking like the best windmill
Everyone else can afford to be late. It’s their own fault for following my example. I’m driving I call the shots.
It’s important for me to comment on other’s behavior. Being in control helps me think I’m in control of my reality.
No time is inconvenient to suffer my sage inquires!
I know best how to manage your time in my borrowed empire
Qualify for progressive subsidized home phone service.
Qualify for progressive subsidized internet
Trick a hapless guy into marrying you.
File for divorce. Of course it’s his fault he failed to cause your happiness.
Use an alimony payment to buy yourself a electronics
Spend hundreds of hours configuring your Facebook
Trick people who are no longer in your life into accepting you as facebook friends
Post scandalizing information. Half truths are better when you’re low on truth. There’s more to spread around
Collect unemployment cheque
Buy yourself a smart Phone. You deserve it.
She who dies with the most possessions wins, right?
Several lifetimes of stuff makes me more a winner. Admit it.
The best way to organize them all is by shape, color, and piles.
Plan to sell my preciouses? Yes, for profitses.
First build a detailed inventory in my brain. This way instead of never finding anything I can spend hours looking through stacks and piles instead
Andrea Monet is the progressive model of efficiency if nothing else! Be enthralled in my glory!
I might need that rubberband. I had better set it near the 400 other ones.
I might need that scrunchee. I had better stuff it in a junk drawer, but which one of 27 junk drawers do I use? This one is close, I’ll think about where to put it more after a nap.
Open space on a tabletop? I need to run to the store for more pencils in boxes!
By covering every surface with stuff I prevent dust from settling. I am in my own estimation highly intelligent. Those IQ testers didn’t know who they were dealing with. I am a powerhouse of wit and ingenuity even though no one agrees.
I need to adopt some cats and ferrets. They’ll understand me.
Time to try a new class to learn a new trade. I might complete it if no good movies are available.
Those last classes I took didn’t land me a CEO job. I deserve more than minimum wage for my low skill labor. 8 hours of labor is the same as every other 8 hours.
Surely you’d let me perform open heart surgery on you. It’s the same 8 hour day.
Hire me as chief of surgery? I have a right to prestige and money.
I am special. therefore the world owes me what i want.
it is unfair when i am denied the wants i label as needs
stop hating me. hire me
you owe me.
social injustice is what i say it is